Gratitude

“The soul that is always grateful lives in closer touch with God than one that never looks to Him in thankful acknowledgment.”- Wallace Wattles

After this Thanksgiving holiday, my mind has been especially focused on gratitude. I seem to have felt a lot more gratitude this year than I have in years previous.

Perhaps it is a sign that I am growing and maturing, turning toward giving thanks for what I do have, rather than focusing on what I do not have. I’m appreciating the smaller things in life, food to eat, family to enjoy, a home to live in, a loving spouse, sweet children, and abundant wealth (compared to 90% of the world- we live in large, heated homes, with running water, carpet, refrigerators and other luxuries).

Happiness is a Choice

Many people who have everything they could want are still miserable because they lack gratitude. Some people who are rich are still unfulfilled because they fail to appreciate what they have.

Yet others who seemingly have nothing can still be so happy, because they’ve chosen to focus on being grateful for what they do have. They’ve made happiness a choice, one that is not dependent on circumstances.

In her book, Happy For No Reason, Marci Shimoff quotes the Dalai Lama, in which he says:

“The real enemy of happiness is the mind’s fixations and delusions. Look at the situation differently, see the truth and the suffering is less. If you have the right mind, you can overcome anything- you can be happy, no matter what.”

Gratitude Brings More Things to be Grateful For

Marci Shimoff says, “Gratitude is absolutely the best way to bring more into your life.” It’s impossible to bring more good things into your life if you’re always focusing on what you don’t like, what you don’t want and what you don’t have.

Whether it’s your job, your relationship, your financial situation, your health, if you’re focusing on the negative, you tend to create even more of it. That’s because what you give your attention to, increases, or shows up more in your life.

On the other hand, if you place your attention on the things you are grateful for (and there is always something, no matter how bad things are), then you create for your self a happiness that is not dependent on circumstances or situations, and you will notice and create more things in your life to be grateful about.

As Wallace Wattles says in The Science of Getting Rich, “The grateful mind is constantly fixed upon the best; therefore it tends to become the best; it takes the form or character of the best, and it will receive the best.”

Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude

“The daily practice of gratitude is one of the conduits by which your wealth will come to you.”

Wallace Wattles

Wealth is more than money, it includes relationships, health, finances, peace, fulfillment and more. Wealth can be achieved (in all these areas), by cultivating an attitude of gratitude. Doing this is simple. It starts by being grateful today, right now, for the things in your life.

“But I’m not grateful for anything!” you might be saying, “Nothing is working for me, everything is wrong.” Well, if you had to be grateful for something, what would it be? Maybe it’s the kindness of a stranger or friend, the smile of a child, a flower, sunrise or sunset, or to have a toilet to use. Start with the small things, and then work out from there.

Make a challenge out of it. What are you grateful for right now? Who are you grateful for? Think of everything you possibly can.

Action Steps

1. Make a daily habit of gratitude. Begin a gratitude journal, carry around a gratitude rock, begin each day before you get out of bed by expressing thanks for what you have.

2. Whenever you begin to feel negative emotions such as fear, frustration, discouragement or depression, begin to focus instead on what you could be grateful for if you really had to be. Make this into a habit and you’ll be amazed at the changes in your life that will result.

Problems are Opportunities in Disguise

“Life is a grindstone, and whether it grinds you down or polishes you up is for you and you alone to decide.”

Everyone makes mistakes and everyone has problems. It is an inescapable part of life. Some people believe that they will be happy once they eliminate their current problems, but the only time you won’t have problems is when you’re dead! Having problems means that you’re alive. In fact, some say that the bigger the problem, the better the person.

Most people view having problems as a negative thing, but it doesn’t have to be this way. We can choose to change our view on the world and see our problems as opportunities. If you have never faced an extremely difficult problem and overcome it, or if you’re in the midst of one, you may have a difficult time believing that problems are opportunities in disguise.

Hitting Bottom

In 1974, Mark Victor Hansen seemed to be on top of the world. He was doing well financially and the world was his oyster. Then the business he was in was adversely affected by economic conditions, and the next thing Mark knew he was checking a book out from the library entitled How to Go Bankrupt by Yourself (he couldn’t afford an attorney).

At his all time lowest moment, he felt like a negative 12 on a scale of 1-10. He was physically ill, tears welled up in his eyes. He climbed into a shell. He felt totally dejected and rejected.

He began unloading toilet paper off railroad cars in New York’s freezing winter, making only $2.14 an hour. He could only afford to put $0.25 into his gas tank at a time. His self esteem was totally trashed. He had hit bottom.

But looking back, he realized that hitting bottom provided his greatest opportunities. It was a turning point in his life. He realized that at that point, the world was totally open to him. He had no job to cling to, no bills, no debts, no obligations. The world was wide open to him. Everything was potential.

Burning Your Bridges

Today Mark Victor Hansen is co-author of the Chicken Soup for the Soul Series, the largest all time best-selling books in history, with sells way into the billions of dollars. He owns a lovely estate and several substantial businesses, and influences millions of people. A friend told Mark later, “You burned your bridges, you had to succeed!”

He thought that his financial disaster had been a problem, but in reality, once he hit bottom, in only turned out to be the start of a new and better life. Like the Phoenix rising from the ashes, his ruin turned out to be the birth of his new beginnings. His problem was really a life-changing opportunity.

Mark is the first to tell everyone that if he can do it, you can too. You can achieve wealth and financial independence. It’s available to everyone that believes they can achieve it.

Many of us face problems that are even worse than financial difficulties, for example, issues with physical appearance, ‘handicaps’, emotional/mental stress, relationship strains or health matters.

None of the challenges need to equate to living a less than extraordinary life. As an example, we can look at the story of Malcolm from Canada.

Ugly Doesn’t Matter

Malcolm had one of the most mangled faces that you’ve ever seen. He had stitches all across his face, one eyelid was stitched shut, as well as three-quarters of his mouth.

He and his fiancee had been walking in the woods. Somehow they found themselves between a mama bear and her cubs. The bear grabbed hold of his fiancee, and Malcolm tried to stop the bear, whereupon the mama bear crushed every major bone in Malcolm’s body. She then almost literally ripped his face off, back toward the scalp.

It was a miracle that he lived, and he underwent restorative surgery for the next eight years. The doctors did all they could do, but it hadn’t helped much. Malcolm saw himself as an ugly person. He didn’t want to come into contact with society.

He decided to take his own life by throwing himself and his wheelchair off the tenth floor of his rehabilitation center. He was ready to push himself over when his father, who was listening to an intuitive voice, came running up and stopped him just in time. He said, “Malcolm, every human being has scar tissue deep inside him somewhere. Most of us where it under a smile, some cosmetics and nice attire. You get to wear yours on the outside, but we’re all the same.”

Later, Malcolm began reading books and listening to audio tapes. He heard “Setbacks are given to ordinary people to make them extraordinary.” He decided that he was an extraordinary person. He wrote down what he wanted to do, what he dreamed about.

He got a job as an insurance salesman- a job where he had to expose himself to people everyday. A few years later he became the top insurance salesman in Vancouver.

Malcolm realized that it wasn’t his looks that were his challenge. It was how he viewed and felt about himself. His physical challenge was an opportunity to discover who he truly was and what he was capable of doing. Once he began to see what he ‘really’ looked like, his deformed face became irrelevant. He was able to break through his fears and achieve amazing results.

The World is Filled with Opportunity

No matter what challenge or problem you face, there is someone who has faced or experienced similar things. There have been two outcomes, those who were defeated, beaten and destroyed by their problems, and those who chose to not give in and give up, but allowed their problems to be turned into opportunities to grow and become a better person. Every problem contains within it the seed of an opportunity.

“But I’m not like them,” you might be saying to yourself, “I’m not a ’super-achiever’.” To believe that you can’t do what others have done is to sell yourself short. You have more potential within you than you could use in 100 lifetimes. YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH!

Action Steps

1. Imagine that your biggest challenge or problem has been sent to you as a gift to help you learn something valuable. What might it be?

2. We all make mistakes, in fact it’s estimated that 70% of our decisions will be wrong. Don’t beat yourself up for your mistakes. Instead learn from them and move on.

3. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over, but expecting different results. We all make mistakes, but we don’t need to make the same ones over and over. Write down the lessons you’ve learned, and then try not to repeat them.